Home Everyday Life The good, the bad and the ugly

The good, the bad and the ugly

by admin

So I had a emotionality mixed couple of days this weekend. I spent Saturday doing that most dreaded of activities for most blokes: clothes shopping for the kids.

Kill. Me. Now.

But alas, as it turns out, the gods were smiling that day. Perhaps Renee took pity on me and sent down some extra help, I can’t be sure, but all I know is that it was, well, pretty seamless. (in hindsight)

Everything purchased, only a handful of fights, under half an hour looking for Albi in various shops, Grace still happy to be seen with us, lunch eaten and quietly sitting waiting for a movie to start, all in under an hour and a half.

That’s bloody good for us. #winning

To cap off this remarkable trip, while driving home in stormy weather, we drove through no less than 3 rainbows (which we always say is mummy’s handiwork), all agreed on (an easy) dinner and sang and laughed all the way. I was so pumped I actually bought a tatts ticket I was feeling so lucky.

Happy days!

Then Sunday happened. The torrential rain continued. Cabin fever began to set in, coinciding with late onset sugar crashing from the pigout at the movies on Saturday. The kids started pushing every button they could. Fights broke out. Tempers were frayed. Wild, unfulfillable threats were made.

I made it to 5pm before I gave in to the hypnotic pull of the unopened bottle of Shiraz staring down at me from the kitchen bench.

I shut the lounge door, subconsciously hoping they’d work things out or just pass out, and sat down at the computer with my glass (3rd) of wine to find some music to soothe the savage beast. But what I found instead were all our old videos.


Fast forward an hour and both kids, now relatively peaceful, are sitting on my lap as we watch one after another of our home videos. Mostly of Grace as a baby (jesus we filmed bloody everything – first child syndrome) but of course Renee, both in person and vocally, featured heavily.

And I sat there sobbing like a baby.

Which is ok, I know that. I’m more than happy for my kids to see that I am vulnerable, that I’m human and things can make me sad. (not just grumpy) They need to know that it’s ok to show your feelings. That bottling things up never helps.

We spoke of things and of times when we were all together. Of shared experience, of love and laughter, of happiness. And it stayed that way for the rest of the night.

Here or not, Renee was still being a great Mum and wife. Bringing us together. Bringing happiness back to our little family.

So the weekend ended as it began. With hope, peace and anticipation of good things to come.

But as the saying goes: tomorrow is another day.

And I’ll just deal with that when I wake up 🙂

Here's some other posts


Nicole Asher June 12, 2017 - 12:47 pm

So raw, real & perfectly beautiful! ❤️

Siobhan Kinsella June 12, 2017 - 12:51 pm

Beautiful Chris

Anita Coldrey June 12, 2017 - 12:52 pm

Agreed you’re a brilliant writer – the real and very raw nature of your words are beautiful! Big hugs. ❤️❤️❤️

Sean Penny June 12, 2017 - 1:42 pm

Dude…. I lost my wife to BC 2 years ago, aged 38, when our daughter was 2 years old.
I was thinking of writting a blog to share “how it is” with the world, but you’re doing it for me!!
I get what you’re saying….
Thanks for sharing

Just A Dad June 12, 2017 - 8:09 pm

Thanks for reaching out and for the kind words Sean! Although I hate hearing this, I’m also happy that you have connected. If you are interested in sharing, I’d love to chat more over PM. I really think that the more we can all hear from blokes in similar circumstances, the easier our journey might become. Hope you are doing ok mate 🙂

Jessica Stafford June 12, 2017 - 1:57 pm


Sara O'Callaghan June 12, 2017 - 5:54 pm

Wish I could just be around the corner to just be there for you and the kids. Love you all, thanks for sharing chris. Xxx

Just A Dad June 12, 2017 - 8:11 pm

I must admit Sarz, that would be great and I miss that closeness. Think you’ll just have to move up here 😉 xxx

Melissa Hobbs June 12, 2017 - 7:27 pm

Love that you keep it so real. X

Just A Dad June 12, 2017 - 8:11 pm

There’s no other way in my book Melissa! X

Gee Luvva June 12, 2017 - 8:28 pm

….and here is today mate. The pain, the frustrations, the joy….and the hope! G

Just A Dad June 12, 2017 - 9:24 pm

Another day at the ranch mate – Albi decided 530am was appropriate this morning so it may all come unstuck this afternoon… Thanks 🙂

Kate Backman June 12, 2017 - 9:16 pm

Some of your words made me giggle mr Martin and some made me tear. X

Just A Dad June 12, 2017 - 9:23 pm

Mission accomplished 😉

Leanne Cusinato June 13, 2017 - 10:53 am

Love this post, Chris. Yes. She is still a great Mum. (Not that I knew her …. but thru all your posts – I can feel the love & admiration you have for her – hence she must be a great Mum)
“Bringing you together…”
Gosh I loved that. You, are an inspiration.
Sun ☀️ will rise Tomoz.
All my love

Just A Dad June 13, 2017 - 11:48 am

Thanks Leanne. You are always encouraging and inspiring in your own right x

Anton Plews June 14, 2017 - 9:15 am

Tomorrow is another day… thank you for writing this Just a Dad. Insight equals understanding.

Theresa Mawson June 21, 2017 - 11:02 pm



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