We’ve had a great time so far back in Melbourne. Staying with family, visiting old friends, sleeping in (to a degree), bitching about the traffic and inclement weather like the locals we once were. Reminiscing about events and good times as we pass memorable places in our travels.
Nostalgia is, however, a double edged sword.
This was where we started our lives together. Me and Renee. Us and our children. Our little family began here. And to a large degree, this is where it ended.
Not that Renee is not included in our every day lives to this day. We still speak of her and include her as if she is physically here with us.
But, just as my 1am-spur-of-the-moment-drunken tattoo in Thailand so aptly means, simply being back in Melbourne very much evokes an emotional “presence of absence”.
Saudade.(Portuguese. Pronounced: so-dar-jay)
Throw in a standard time of year that we all miss those not able to be here, and it certainly makes for some poignant moments.
Even though you may question why would I choose to place ourselves in situations where the potential for sadness is increased, I think it is important for personal growth and respectful to do so.
Sure there is credence in the notion of “moving on”, or limiting the opportunity for melancholy. But I believe that without the acknowledgement of sadness and pain in our lives, how would we truly know if we were happy, or at least on the road to happiness?
Not that dwelling on, or immersing ourselves in depressive states is healthy in the long term, but neither is trying to convince ourselves that we are eternally happy and everything is just honky dory.
Yin / yang. Happy / sad. Good / evil. Balance my friends is what this life is all about. In everything.
I have never been one for fanatical devotion to any one particular thing. Whether it be a job, diet, person, sport, drug, hobby or lifestyle, I have witnessed many who have and there is always, without fail, a downside. The universe is just put together that way and we can’t positive think our way through that shit.
And the same goes, if not more, for our concept of happiness.
So over this Christmas period I know there will be many of you having the same sulky moments as I will. But just try to accept that there must always be balance. Use these moments to reflect on that which brings your happiness. I for one find that a couple of bevvies always helps (with everything) 🤣🤣
We’ve just reached that time of the holidays where we get to hang with the grandparents, which everyone knows is fucking awesome – handball time!! No seriously, it’s great to put your folks back in the hotseat for a few days isn’t it? Oh, and we miss them too of course. 😉
So from me, GG and the Albacado; merry Christmas and may your holidays be relaxing, restful, smile filled and sensibly inebriated for a good portion of them.
Such a beautiful take on living with grief. You are amazing buddy. I hope you guys have many moments over chrissy of real joy. Xxx
Same to you FOD x 😁
Merry Christmas to you all oxo
and to you mate. G
Beautifully said. Merry Christmas.
You certainly have a way with words Chris…This is a very thought provoking piece with a side of clarity May You, Grace & Alby have many moments of real joy, happiness & laughter amongst the sad times together. Merry Christmas to you. Take care xx
I get all that. I think it’s cathartic going back to places and memories. In the moment it hurts but I think you do grow in the long run.
Sounds like you’ve squeezed alot into your holiday so far! Enjoy and
Merry Christmas! xo
Merry Xmas JAD.
Merry Christmas team, hugs, respect and love to you all
Much respect and Merry Christmas to you and your bubbas x
You are just spot on Chris your children are so lucky to have you Renee must be with you all time enjoy your break with your parents